Laverne And Shirley
I think I really like it best when you
can kid the pants off a girl when the opportunity arises, but it’s a funny
thing. The girls I like best are the ones I never feel much like kidding. Sometimes I think they’d like it if you kidded them―in fact, I know
they would―but it’s hard to get started, once you’ve known them a pretty
long time and never kidded them. Anyway, I was telling you about that afternoon
Jane and I came close to necking. It was raining like hell and we were out on
her porch, and all of a sudden this booze hound her mother was married to came
out on the porch and asked Jane if there were any cigarettes in the house. I
didn’t know him too well or anything, but he looked like the kind of guy that
wouldn’t talk to you much unless he wanted something off you.
He hated everybody’s guts, damn
funny thing is, though, I was sort of thinking of something else while I shot
the bull. I live in New York, and I was thinking about the lagoon in Central
Park, down near Central Park South. I was wondering if it would be frozen over
when I got home, and if it was, where did the ducks go. I was wondering where
the ducks went when the lagoon got all icy and frozen over.
time she’s up all night smoking cigarettes. Finally
I sat down on this bench, where it wasn’t so goddam dark. Boy, I was still
shivering like a bastard, and the back of my hair, even though I had my hunting
hat on, was sort of full of little hunks of ice. I thought
probably I’d get pneumonia and die. I started picturing millions of jerks
coming to my funeral and all. My grandfather from Detroit, that keeps calling
out the numbers of the streets when you ride on a goddam bus with him, and my aunts―I
have about fifty aunts―and all my lousy cousins.
“I may be wrong but I believe your nose
is bleeding, dear,” she said, all of a sudden. “That’s
all right. We can smoke till they start screaming at us,” I said. She took
a cigarette off me, and I gave her a light. Then I watched her take off her gloves.
But I certainly wouldn’t have minded shooting the crap with old Phoebe
for a while. Then
she looked at me and asked me what I was afraid she was going to ask me.
“Ernest wrote that he’d be home on Wednesday, that Christmas vacation
would start on Wednesday,” she said. “I hope you weren’t
called home suddenly because of illness in the family.” She really looked
worried about it. She wasn’t just being nosy, you could tell. Right
that minute, the conductor came around for old Mrs. Morrow’s ticket, and it
gave me a chance to quit shooting it.
though, I got undressed and got in bed. I felt like praying or something, when
I was in bed, but I couldn’t do it. I can’t always pray when I feel like it. In
the first place, I’m sort of an atheist.
Laverne’s Arranged Marriage
I knew a lot
of guys at Pencey I thought were a lot handsomer than Stradlater, but they
wouldn’t look handsome if you saw their pictures in the Year Book. They’d look
like they had big noses or their ears stuck out. I’ve had that experience
started walking around the room, very slow and all, the way he always did,
picking up your personal stuff off your desk and chiffonier. He always picked
up your personal stuff and looked at it.
I should’ve given them the freeze, after they did that, but
the trouble was, I really felt like dancing. I’m very fond of dancing,
sometimes, and that was one of the times. So all of a sudden, I sort of leaned
over and said, “Would any of you girls care to dance?” I didn’t ask
them crudely or anything. But God damn it, they thought that
was a panic, too.
“I have a kid sister that’s
only in the goddam fourth grade. You’re about as good as she is, and she can
dance better than anybody living or dead.” Anyway,
she was somebody you always felt like talking to on the phone. But I was too
afraid my parents would answer, and then they’d find out I was in New York and
kicked out of Pencey and all. So I just finished putting on my shirt. Then I
got all ready and went down in the elevator to the lobby to see what was going
In my mind, I’m probably the biggest sex maniac you ever saw. Sometimes
I can think of very crumby stuff I wouldn’t mind doing if the
opportunity came up. I can even see how it might be quite a lot of fun, in a
crumby way, and if you were both sort of drunk and all, to get a girl and
squirt water or something all over each other’s face. The thing is, though, I
don’t like the idea. It stinks, if you analyze it.
Some stupid guy had thrown peanut
shells all over the stairs, and I damn near broke my crazy neck. It
was around ten-thirty, I guess, when I finished it. I wasn’t tired, though, so
I looked out the window for a while. It wasn’t snowing out any more, but every
once in a while you could hear a car somewhere not being able to get started. You could also hear old Ackley snoring.
She became a successful film director responsible for the likes of Big (1988) and A League Of Their Own (1992). Cindy Williams, who played the role of Shirley Feeney, passed away on January 25, 2023. Her family confirmed that she died at the age of 75 after a brief illness, the Independent reports.
THE FIRST THING
I did when I got off at Penn Station, I went into this phone booth. I felt like
giving somebody a buzz. I left my bags right outside the booth so that I could
watch them, but as soon as I was inside, I couldn’t think of anybody to call
up. My kid sister Phoebe goes to bed around
nine o’clock―so I couldn’t call her up.
He lived on Anthony
Wayne Avenue. While
I was walking, I passed these two guys that were unloading this big Christmas
tree off a truck. One guy kept https://datingrated.com/mi-gente-review/ saying to the other guy, “Hold the
sonuvabitch up! Hold it up, for Chrissake!” It certainly was
a gorgeous way to talk about a Christmas tree.